"The unbearable lightness of being", by Milan Kundera

I finished reading "The unbearable lightness of being", by Milan Kundera. It was one of the best read till now. I found the writer's technique very unique. He has mixed the real incidents with the fiction in homogenous way. Sometime you get confused if it is some real story or a fiction. He keeps coming in the story and talking to readers explaining about the character
"The characters in my novels are my own unrealized possibilities. That is why I am equally fond of them all and equally horrified by them. Each one has crossed a boarder that I myself have circumvented."

He has written about everything in his novel. I have habit of taking notes of some interesting lines in the books I read. I did the same this time. I thought that it would make more sense to categorize them.  I hope you will get enough reason why the book was best read after reading the quotes. 


Life:
We live everything as it comes, without warning, like an actor going on cold. and what can life be worth if the first rehearsal for life is life itself?
Anyone whose goal is "something higher must expect some day to suffer vertigo (longing to fall)

The goals we pursue are always veiled. A girl who longs for marriage longs for something she knows nothing about. The boy who hankers after fame has no idea what fame is. The thing that gives our every move it's meaning is always totally unknown to us.

The world is nothing but a vast concentration camp of bodies, one like the next, with souls invisible.

She, the absurd encounter of the sperm of the most manly of men and the egg of the most beautiful of women?

Human time doesn't turn in a circle; it runs ahead in a straight line. That is why man cannot be happy: happiness is the longing for repetition.

Four kind of people
1. who live for love from unknown -artists and celebrities, happiness doesn't last as at some point people stop admiring them
2. who live for love from known- happier than the people of first category
3. who live for love from beloved - similar to the first category
4. who live in the imaginary eyes of those who are not present (dreamers)-
Stalin's son laid down his life for shit.
Attaching love to sex is one of the most bizarre ideas the creator ever had.


Love & relationship:
Love
The only relationship that can make both partners happy is one in which sentimentality has no place and neither partner makes any claim on the life and freedom of the other.

His love for Tereza was beautiful, but it was also tiring: he had constantly had to hide things from her, sham, dissemble, make amends, buck her up, calm her down, give her evidence of his feelings, play the defendant to her jealousy, her suffeing, and her dreams, feel guilty, make excuses and apologies. Now what was tiring had disappeared and only the beauty remained.

She had an overwhelming desire to tell him, like the most banal of women, Don't let me go, hold me tight, make me your plaything, your slave, be strong! But they were words she could not say. The only thing she said when he released her from his embrace was, "You don't know how happy I am to be with you." That was the most her reserved nature allowed her to express. 
(it's very much difficult to fall for a reserved person who would never speak out his/her love to you and it is sometime depressing )

"Why don't you use your strength on me?" she said. "Because love means renouncing strength", said Franz softly.

Tereza knew what happens during the moment love is born: the woman cannot resist the voice calling forth her terrified soul; the man cannot resist the woman whose soul thus responds to his voice. Tomas had no defence against the lure of love, and Tereza feared for him every minute of every hour.

Love & Lust
Making love with a woman and sleeping with a woman are two separate passions, not merely different but opposite. Love does not make itself felt in the desire for copulation (a desire that extends to an infinite number of women) but in the desire for shared sleep (a desire limited to one woman).

What is flirtation? One might say that it is behavior leading another to believe that sexual intimacy is possible, while preventing that possibility from becoming a certainty. In other words, flirting is a promise of sexual intercourse without a guarantee.

Marriage
Not "respect Marie-Claude," but " respect the woman in Marie-Claude."
For twenty years he had seen his mother- a poor, weak creature who needed his protection - in his wife.

(This was how he tolerated his wife for so long.)
Yes, a husband's funeral is a wife's true wedding! The climax of her life's work! The reward for her sufferings!
(So, it's not just men who are tired of the commitment and restrictions.)


Break-ups
At some point, he realized to his great surprise that he was not particularly unhappy. Sabina's physical presence was much less important than he had suspected. What was important was the golden footprint; the magic footprint she had left on his life and no one could ever remove. (break-ups).
Loves are like empires: when the idea they are founded on(fidelity) crumbles, they, too, fade away.
Does he love me ? Does he love anyone more than me? Does he love me more than I love him? Perhaps all the questions we ask of love, to measure, test, probe, and save it, have the additional effect of cutting it short. Perhaps the reason we are unable to love is that we yearn to be loved, that is, we demand something (love) from our partner instead of delivering ourselves up to him demand-free and asking for nothing but his company.

Politics:
Criminal regimes were made not by criminals but by enthusiasts convinced they had discovered the only road to paradise. They defended that road so valiantly that they were forced to execute many people. Later it became clear that there was no paradise, that the enthusiasts were therefore murderers.

Is a fool on the throne relieved of all responsibility merely because he is a fool ?
He relates Oedipus's story with what communists did in Prague. The politicians didn't know that they were doing but were still guilty like Oedipus was. Oedipus could punish himself but politicians are never ready to do that. I think same goes with what maoists did in Nepal. They are not less wrong then Oedipus.

God:
The very beginning of Genesis tells us that God created man in order to gie him dominion over fish and fowl and all creatures. Of course, Genesis was written by a man, not a horse. There is no certainty that God actually did grant man dominion over other creatures. What seems more likely, in fact is that man invented God to sanctify the dominion that he had usurped for himself over the cow and the horse. Yes, the right to kill a deer or a cow is the only thing all of mankind can agree upon, even during the bloodiest of wars.

Thanks Bibash Sapkota​ for the book. I highly recommend this book to the serious readers.

s of his story. This was a bit new to me.